19 Oct The Stigma of Being Alone in Public
There’s something recently that’s been on my mind.
The concept of alone.
Not lonely, that’s an entirely different ideal. I’m talking about doing things alone, namely in public, and namely back in school.
I remember when I was in high school there had always been this stigma around doing things by yourself.
“I can’t go to the movies by myself, I’ll look like a loner!”
“I can’t go out for dinner by myself, people will think I don’t have friends!”
“I can’t do this or that because SHAAAAAAAME”
Something I learnt while finishing school and then moving far away from home is basically… screw that!
In high school it’s all about friend groups and hangouts, and that’s totally fine! But upon getting older and becoming an adult (*shudder*) it makes you think about how silly that ideal really is.
If you want to see a movie that none of your friends are interested in, then go! Why should we be held back by what others want to do. Be honest with yourself and with others, and be independent. Sure, if you don’t want to turn up to a party by yourself because you don’t know anyone except your friend there, then yeah! Hitch a ride. Safety first.
But I’m referencing the stigma around doing things alone, which kind of sucks if I’m honest.
Now that I am a (semi) functioning human being who pays her taxes and rent and all that other necessary stuff, it’s given me a perspective that wasn’t as big of a priority in school. I had grades to worry about, dammit! Which is that you have to fend for yourself, whether you’ve got 2 friends or 200 friends, you’ve still got to make sure you’re doing what YOU want to do. Otherwise what’s the point really.
Don’t want to hang out with people tonight? Say no. Want to treat yourself to a nice meal at a restaurant but your friends are busy? Treat yourself!
When it boils down to it, there are a lot of things that, when in school, we thought were the most important things ever. “God mum! Becky has blue eyeshadow. Why can’t I wear blue eyeshadow?! You’re the worst!” (Take note young little millennials, Mum is right, no-one needed bright blue eyeshadow that young. Be thankful you didn’t catch that trend).
Anyway, to the point. Don’t be constricted by the stigma society puts on certain things and don’t get stuck in a high school mindset. With all the annoyances of adulthood, I hope that we can at least move past the stigma that doing things by yourself is bad. Ain’t nobody got time to think about that.
Photography by myself
I know it’s been AGES since I last posted but I’m trying to get back into it!
If anyone has suggestions for blog posts or things you want me to write about, let me know!
Until next time…